"It's amazing how much 'mature wisdom' resembles being too tired." --Robert Heinlein

The Church of Reality




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Insights from Lost & Found

I wonder what I'll find out next!

This is Magger Frane's 'blog.


I like living alone!

I've been living alone for over five years, since August 1998 (when I started keeping an online diary).

If I really hated living alone, I would've found a roomie by now. I've had offers from people I know well. I could've searched for a roomie. But, no, I continue living alone, even as a single man -- single for 18 months! Has it really been that long? Hmmm.

I claim to be "open" to the idea of living with somebody else ... I claim that living with somebody is part of my long-term goals ... but I'd be picky about whom and where ... which is why it hasn't yet happened.

Living alone I always have a retreat from the rest of the world. Living alone I am in charge of the apartment. I can keep it as clean or as dirty as I want, I can keep the thermostat exactly where I want, I don't have to discuss or compromise any decision about purchases, decorations, cooking, having people over, noise or quiet, intoxication, masturbation, what to watch or hear ...


Occasionally I feel lonely living alone, but I can remedy that pretty quickly by calling friends or family on the telephone, or logging into AIM, or communicating with people via LiveJournal, or simply leaving the apartment for a more crowded space. I have no shortage of social opportunities, there are plenty of places to go in this city ... usually if I'm spending time at home alone it is because I choose to do so, or because I'm worn out, or because I want to do some chores.


The US Census has found an increase in the number of people living alone. One reason for this increase is affluence. More people are economically independent and can afford to and choose to live alone.

However, there's definitely still a cultural bias against living alone ... most people view it as a short term stage of young adulthood, or as the ending stage of senior citizenship. The cultural ideal is still to form a couple, to live together, and to have children if you are able.

Is it selfish to live by myself year after year? Is that a bad thing?

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